Relationships with Sandy Daley – “What happens behind closed doors: stays behind closed doors!”

When it comes to love, nothing is off limits- except your relationship itself. Love requires time, patience, honesty and also privacy. Nothing destroys a relationship faster than rumours, hearsays and as we say in Jamaica, “Carry go bring come“! The demise of that perhaps once “beautiful, might be the relationship of my life” situation, will weigh heavily on your heart, as you instantly recognize that gossip and of course your overzealousness, contributed to its destruction. Should your hot new romance remain a secret? Should it be hidden from everyone but your immediate family? Make mention of it only when you are walking down the aisle? Unfortunately, you may have to do these things in order to keep your relationship intact!

The great Aristotle wrote, “Love is composed of a single soul, inhabiting two bodies.” Nowhere in that quote did he mention your girlfriend Tameka or your nosey mother-in-law.

Most people would say “whatever happens between a man and a woman is their business,” I agree wholeheartedly with the prior statement. Negative talk and destructive rumours will ruin the union between you and your partner, especially if it is a new relationship. A new relationship is prone to miscommunication and misunderstanding, so it is best to keep your relationship private, in order to maintain control and keep the rumour mill at bay.

"But Sandy, don't you realize that people know who you are now, and they are interested in what you are doing-especially if you are dating? a friend asked me recently. "I think that you are living underneath a rock if you can't see that," he went on to say. "My work is public yes," I responded. "But I try my best to keep my life, and even my family life, out of the spotlight as much as possible. The public does not need to know everything about me."

But Sandy, don’t you realize that people know who you are now, and they are interested in what you are doing-especially if you are dating?” a friend asked me recently. “I think that you are living underneath a rock if you can’t see that,” he went on to say. “My work is public yes,” I responded. “But I try my best to keep my life, and even my family life, out of the spotlight as much as possible. The public does not need to know everything about me.

Shining a spotlight on your relationship, by disclosing every single detail about your husband or man to your girlfriends, is not a good thing. You also do need to take into consideration that not all of your friends really do want the best for you. Unfortunately, the slang word “frenemy” is a real thing, as that friend that you love and trust, might not be a true friend after all. Many times, the hoopla, and pomp and circumstance that you create while you broadcast your love, will do nothing but incite more hatred and dislike from that frenemy- so do not divulge too much information to anyone.

If problems arise in your relationship, new or otherwise, you must sit with your partner and discuss the issues of concern. Your friend, a frenemy or a real friend, cannot help you with unresolved issues between your partner and yourself, as what is between a man and a woman, should remain as such. Issues that are not discussed will only become bigger problems and will not help you or your partner in the long run.

Persuaded by many to write a book, Sandy began working on "Whose Vagina Is It, Really?" and has not looked back since. The book which has many tongues a wagging, not only because of its title, but also its contents and the issues surrounding women, as detailed by Sandy, has received rave reviews. She has travelled to New York, Barbados, Jamaica, Boston, Los Angeles and Michigan, during the last two years promoting her book.

Persuaded by many to write a book, Sandy began working on “Whose Vagina Is It, Really?” and has not looked back since. The book which has many tongues a wagging, not only because of its title, but also its contents and the issues surrounding women, as detailed by Sandy, has received rave reviews. She has travelled to New York, Barbados, Jamaica, Boston, Los Angeles and Michigan, during the last two years promoting her book.

Given an opportunity to relate just to each other, with no one else interfering in their love life, a man and a woman might have a chance of creating a beautiful relationship. Without the negativity, the jealousness or the overzealous onlookers, your relationship can survive. Hopefully you will not be included in the recent statistics that suggests that most couples go their separate ways after only three to five months of dating. This statistic does not ensure that your relationship is doomed, but it should act as a guide of sorts, and encourage you to do all that is necessary in order to have a successful relationship or marriage.

The wonderful feeling of knowing that your partner wants to be there with you is great, and many say that this should be enough, but of course this is not true. Relationships are tough, difficult to maintain, and you must be patient with yourself and your partner -even during the rough patches.

Privacy, I believe, should be number one in a relationship, as this gives you the opportunity to really unite with your partner on an emotional level. As difficult as this may seem, even for Sandy Daley, privacy will be number one in my relationship (when I meet the right one of course). It is my belief that at the end of the day, when I and Mr. Wonderful are alone, whatever we or do or say to each should remain between us, as each relationship requires commitment, honesty and time to grow.

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