RELATIONSHIPS with Sandy Daley: “When a man speaks; put on your Dumbo ears and listen!”
It is my belief that a man will clue you in from the very beginning as to who he is and what his intentions are for you. The only problem of course is that many of us refuse to “really listen” to what he is saying, not only by his actions but also to his words, as men are not as complicated as women. It is in your best interest to dial into his frequency and receive the information as it is being transmitted to you. Often, men will try their best to let you know what they really want or do not want from you, but we are so often caught up in the “great sex”, potential of a husband or partner, great boyfriend or our knight in shining armour with perfect credit, dark chocolate skin and pearly white teeth; that we never hear what they say are truly saying.
Some of us will even get mad at him when he does not respond in the manner that we want him to, or see us as how we think that he should. William Hazlitt wrote, “An honest man speaks the truth, though it may give offence; a vain man, in order that it may”. Of course there are men out there that will lie through their teeth, just to get into your pants, but should women not be held accountable for what was inevitable, if the love of your life tried to tell you what his intentions were from the beginning? Why did you stay in a situation so long that was no good for you?
There are many reasons that some women stay in bad relationships, and at the top of the list is the fear of being single, and unfortunately an increasing number of men are clued into this and will use this to their advantage. It is however your job to nip their thinking in the bud. “ You know that there are many women out there just dying for a man, and are sitting at home just waiting for a Mr. Right to come into their lives and take care of them”, an old friend of mine (let’s call him Donovan) said to me one day. “They just seem to want to have a man come to their rescue and take care of them, and that is why men will do the things that they do such as cheat , not treat them properly or emotionally neglect them as most women seem to so desperate for any man.”
“Most men,” he went on to add, “would have more than one woman if they could, and most do and most of us do not wish to be tied down, but we only do it to please you guys. You guys need to stop putting expectations on relationships,” he finished off by saying. Donovan, in my opinion, was a special breed!
“And yes, I do agree with you, that some of us are afraid of being single, but that is definitely not Sandy Daley and many other women that I know, as I know many guys that are interested in dating me or making me their special someone,” I said to him with conviction. “I also already have all the kids that I will ever want and really and truly do and can make a dollar for myself, so your money or your credit cards are not needed by me,” I finished off by saying.
Obviously, it was not my job to try to change Donovan’s mind or even be upset at his way of thinking, as you should never be mad at man when he opens up his heart enough to tell you that you should not “expect” anything from him. Remember, you are in control of your life, and what you will or will not accept. If you wish to make him a “Mr. Right Now” or if you wish to run to the hills far away from him, that is your choice. However, always remember to carry your Dumbo ears with you to use in the future, as you will be needing them for the next potential “Mr. Right” or a “Mr. Right” that is only for you.